TL;DR:
- Beverly is Suzanne’s mom, her favorite teacher, the most loving, kindhearted, generous, and genuine person who now has Alzheimer’s.
- Beverly lived a life full of gratitude and abundance and exemplified this throughout her life by scanning for the good in every opportunity possible and being grateful for it all.
- You are challenged to find gratitude, scan for the good, and quite simply, be more like Beverly.
Do you remember the “Be Like Mike” Nike commercials from the late 1990s? You put on the sneakers and suddenly you can jump and dunk and soar and do all of the things Michael Jordan can do. Well, I don’t personally know Michael Jordan, so I can’t give you insight as to how he makes all of those things happen. However, I have the honor to introduce you to my favorite teacher, my mom, Beverly. She has been an angel here on Earth for as long as I can remember. Her unconditional love sustains, strengthens, and protects me. The greatest honor of my life is being her daughter.
Without my brother or I ever knowing it, we were being conditioned to consistently scan for the good stuff throughout our childhood. Click To Tweet
So what does Beverly have to do with Teaching Happier? As my favorite teacher, she has taught me one of the secrets of life and I am honored to share it with you today.
Here’s the quick summary of Beverly Olney: You already know she is my mom. She is also the most loving, kindhearted, generous, and genuine person I have ever known. But you must also know that at just 67 years old, she has Alzheimer’s and her cognitive abilities are decreasing rapidly. It is a heartbreaking season for my family.
Scan for the Good
Growing up, gratitude was an important family value. Instead of asking, “How was your day?” my mom would ask, “Who helped you today? Who did you help? When did you laugh the hardest?” Without my brother or I ever knowing it, we were being conditioned to consistently scan for the good stuff throughout our childhood.
Over the past 41 years, conversations between my mom and I have always come naturally. But now, it’s different—it takes careful thought to craft a conversation my mom can engage in confidently.
A few weeks before COVID restrictions increased, I went to Rochester, NY to spend some time with my parents. One afternoon we zipped around and got a few errands done. As we were getting out of the car to head into the grocery store, I dug into my purse to get my mask. Mom forgot hers so I gently reminded her to put it on. As she slowly looped the elastic around her ears she said, “Aren’t these just the best things? They are so comfortable! Love the color!” I smiled and thought, nobody would ever say masks are comfortable and ‘the best,’ yet here she is celebrating the accessory of 2020.
Then as we walked into the store she exclaims, “You know what’s crazy? We are going to walk in here and they are going to have everything we need! How great is that?!” My eyes had tears before my heart captured the beauty in what she was saying.
The mask. The store. She saw beauty in it all. She actually can’t NOT see beauty in it all.
Remembering Gratitude
Ask her about the weather? If it’s sunny, she’ll say the sky looks beautiful. On a rainy day, she’ll explain how good it is for the flowers. On a still day, she will describe how the pine trees in her yard majestically stand against the sky. If it’s windy? She’ll say it feels refreshing. And when she sees a sunset, she’ll declare, often with tears in her eyes, it’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.
Do you see it? My mom, who has lived past 67 years grounded in profound gratitude and abundance, can only scan for the good. As her mental capacity weakens quicker than any of our hearts can bear, she is hanging onto the good stuff. The abundance. The blessings. It’s all she embraces at this stage of the disease.
How beautiful is that?!
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Will I one day suffer from Alzheimer’s? Research tells me it’s likely. But if I can use her example to live a life of gratitude and abundance now and continue to scan for good, this may be all I will have left someday too.
I cannot imagine a lesson more important than this.
New year, new you?
Nah. You be you.
But maybe try to be a little more like Beverly. Try and remember gratitude.
Small Shift, Big Gift!
Try to scan for the good at work and at home. As you do this, check in with yourself to see if it positively impacts your relationships, energy level, or perspective.
ABOUT SUZANNE DAILEY
Suzanne Dailey is a proud member of the Teach Better Family! She is an instructional coach in the Central Bucks School District where she has the honor and joy of working with elementary teachers and students in 15 buildings. Suzanne is Nationally Board Certified, a Fellow of the National Writing Project, and has a Masters Degree in Reading. She is dedicated to nurturing and developing the whole child and teacher. Suzanne lives in Doylestown, Pennsylvania with her husband and two children.
